Friday, October 07, 2016

To Kill A Mockingbird

My favourite of movie of all time! I wish I was even half of an Atticus Finch in my life. I have the utmost degree of respect for the writer who penned this wonderful character and of course full marks to Mr. Handsome Gregory Peck for delivering the role to perfection! Absolutely fell in love with him..such a dignified demeanour! The movie is an absolute work of art....loved it..ditto for the book!

So close and yet so far!

Been thinking of starting this venture for the last almost 18 months now. Have done quite a bit of research, planning, structuring and what not...even spoken to an ex-colleague about it in detail and not to forget a presentation(in it's entirety! like an absolute idiot with no business sense at all) to a guy I was hoping to partner with. Heck, I even have a business plan! And yet...the lure of just going back to a prestigious position commanding a whole lot of respect, utilising the experience I have painstakingly gathered over the last twelve years keeps making me re-think. I also wonder if this is what I was 'meant' to do! I mean I have never ever in my life thought about doing this as a hobby let alone a career option but then I am sure this is true of the guy who started the inexpensive sanitary towels company too! He just saw a problem and found an affordable way to fix it! I don't have to be overly passionate about it..and it's not like things I have been passionate about are viable career options at this stage anyway. Get on with it babe..get it out of your system now..into the world. Focus, believe and deliver!

The sweetest thing..

Parenthood! Isn't cuddling up to your baby and sleeping at night like the sweetest thing you have ever done in your life. I honestly can't remember anything that comes close to this bliss. It won't last long but until it does I consider myself one lucky woman to have had the pleasure of becoming a mother. She's not even two yet and she tells me to 'mile' when I am frowning for too long or appear tense. She then proceeds to point towards a small pimple on my chin and asks me 'hurt?' and without waiting for my response plants the sweetest ever kiss on it to make it better. Is there anything more beautiful and pristine in this world than the innocence of a child? Thank you mother nature for letting me experience this joy, this love and this beauty which I would have totally deprived myself of had I finally not decided to be a mom.

Motherhood

They say motherhood has changed me. I have wondered for the longest time now (longest being last two years of my lovely doll's arrival) if it really has and I realised today that as a matter of fact it absolutely has not! I couldn't believe I would take a break from work for anything in this world but I did despite every friend I possibly knew advising me against it, despite my own lack of respect for ladies who have gladly done this in the past, despite several unanswered questions in my mind and uncertainties I wouldn't want to face, despite anyone who knew me well rolling their eyes in disbelief, despite being sniggered at 'for taking it easy', despite being passed off as a 'housewife' ....I did it with no specific date in mind to get back except for a desperate desire to do so as soon as I was ready. Difficult but doable I guess. I survived! That's exactly who I am.. isn't it? Someone who will do what their own set of principles, values, priorities, expectations of self, ambitions and emotions guide them towards. I have always done this and it's not that I have always been right but my guiding force has been pretty much the same. I have listened to myself...something I am happy doesn't figure in my list of regrets ;)